So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I'm sobbing to NWA
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
