problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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