i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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