We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Randomize
