I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
wanna go halves on a baby?
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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