I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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