Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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