So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
