guys are not supposed to queef...right?
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
