I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
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