I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
