I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Randomize
