just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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