So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
