Ambien. No doubt about it.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
