Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
