would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
