we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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