My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
