I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
So many bounce houses so little time
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
