ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
