I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize