I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
