im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
