Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
