Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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