Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
