i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
40s are totally the cure
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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