How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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