Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
jump out the window naked night went bad
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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