the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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