We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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