Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
