Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Randomize
