She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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