I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize
