weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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