Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I just gargled with NyQuil
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
