Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
You left your phone here
Wait...
Randomize
