She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
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