shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
