you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Randomize