My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
