I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
