yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
