They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize
