Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
