i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
and she was petting her beer can
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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