i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
