are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
