Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
