what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
