Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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