so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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